I put the ‘p’ in picnic…

I am in disgrace.  I may never be taken on a picnic again.  Mum prepared lots of lovely food so we could eat al fresco near a favourite pub and I messed up.  Big time.

It didn’t start well because I was so excited that I tugged her out of the car and hurtled towards the pub so fast that she couldn’t keep up and had to let go of my lead.  That’s a no-no.  I’m still head down in embarrassment when we sat down and, with all the stress, had to relieve myself.  NOT against the table she yelled.  Oops, another mistake.

IMG_1560She put the picnic bag down on the grass and started on her drink while I perused the other people and their dogs.  Then it happened – I don’t know what got into me – I raised my leg again and peed against the picnic bag!  She was incandescent, snatched the bag and started yelling how I was a disgrace.  Seems there’s already a ‘p’ in picnic.

There was more.  The bag went straight in the washing machine when we got home but, while she took out the food containers, she forgot about the red paper napkins; they disintegrated in the wash and the bag came out covered in red blobs. I may have to lie low for some time.


I am left in charge

Mum went out today for coffee with friends and left me in charge…of the summerhouse!  The sun was shining and it was really warm so she said I could stay outside in the yard but she would leave open the door of the summerhouse in case it got chilly.  It’s June but it can still be a bit cool.  Mum complains on the beach when there’s wind as it cuts the temperature by several degrees.  I don’t notice, of course, being covered in fur. IMG_1532

It stayed lovely and warm but I lay on the rug anyway, just to show I was the boss.  My mum was ages, far longer than it takes to have coffee, so when I heard the car pull up I made a big noise so that she knew I hadn’t been neglecting my duty as yard guard.  I sound quite frightening if you don’t know me; there’s some power in my bark I tell you.  Mum isn’t frightened of course and just tells me to shut up.  Which I think is very ungrateful since I’ve been protecting the property while she gossips and shops the afternoon away.